Today I feel...

Today I feel ok. I met with my lawyer yesterday and filed the counter complaint. I am now ready to proceed with the divorce. I tried to speak with Brian about being more cooperative, but he has so many pent up emotions that he can't even discuss it. I picked up some For Sale By Owner papers from the credit union today. I really want to get moving on the sale of the house, but Brian needs to "think about it". I'm not sure what there is to think about. The sooner it's up, the sooner it sells. I can't just accept any old offer without his consent, so it's not like I can pull something on him. I asked if I could put the boat up. Two weeks ago when I found out about his adultery he said I could have the boat, now he says maybe he wants it. He just keeps playing games that are going to cost money. If he wants it, fine, then I'll ask for 1/2 the value in the divorce judgment. If he doesn't want it, fine, let's sell it and split the profit. I mean, we did buy it together after all. It's not just HIS boat. But he keeps saying to put everything through the lawyers. That's too much money spent! He needs to make up his mind if he wants it or not. Anyway, he's gone out of town to a friend's wedding. I was invited but he told me I couldn't go with him. I would have like to see these people one more time. I really like the parents, Larry and Mary Ann, and the groom Joel and his brother Steve, stood up in our wedding. It would have been nice, but I guess to much for Brian to handle being near me that long.

I'm feeling pretty good because I've come to peace with knowing the marriage is pretty dead. There will be no reviving this one. Now I just want to sell this house and move out. Hopefully after spending a weekend with his friends, he'll decide to let me put it up.

Today's my dad's birthday! Happy Birthday Dad! Love you!

My birthday is in two days. I can't believe I'm going to be 34! Tonight I'm celebrating my birthday at my in-laws. They invited me over to celebrate. I'm really happy they aren't letting go of me because of this divorce. I really hope when things are all said and done that we'll be able to get along.